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  #1  
Old 04-15-2008, 09:44 AM
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Default Embrace the Suck...lol

A few sayings I thought were funny while searching for a military lingo translator.
Stolen from the book of the same name.

"Back to the taxpayers": Navy slang for where a wrecked aircraft gets sent.
Beltway clerk: A derisive term for a Washington political operative or civilian political hatchet man?in other words, someone who trades on his supposed political connections. May refer to so-called "Washington defense experts" who have never served in the armed forces.
"Embrace the suck": Translation: The situation is bad, but deal with it.
Fallujah: An Iraqi city. As slang, however, the phrase "another Fallujah" means a screwed-up place crawling with bad guys.

FOB: Forward Operations Base ("the yard"). Protected area for Iraqi or coalition soldiers.
Fobbits: Derogatory term for soldiers who never leave a FOB.

FUBAR: F***** Up Beyond All Recognition. Fake acronym. A World War II term still in use.
FUBIJAR: A play on FUBAR. F***** Up, But I'm Just A Reservist. A sarcastic jab by a reservist at criticism from a regular.
Groundhog Day: Every day of your tour in Iraq. Terms suggests the days never change?always long and hot, and the same events keep recurring. From the Bill Murray movie Groundhog Day.
Hooah: U.S. Army slang. Actually a shout. Signals approval or solidarity. Means most anything except "no."
John Wayne Driving School: Banging up a Humvee in the process of teaching new soldiers to drive it.
LPCs: Leather Personnel Carriers. Better known as boots.
Marineland: Slang for Iraq's Anbar province, which is largely patrolled by U.S. Marines
Mookie: Nickname for Iraqi Shia leader Muqtada al-Sadr. See: Mahdi Militia. ("Hey, the Cav's going back into Najaf. Mookie and the Mookie Army are restless again.")
MOUT: Military Operations in Urban Terrain. A general description for house-to-house searches, raids, and patrols in an urban area.
"Pig looking at a wristwatch": Slang for a dumbfounded look. ("Stop looking at that mop like a pig looking at a wristwatch, and clean the floor.")
Ranger candy: An 800-milligram Motrin (ibuprofen) pill.

Semper Fi: U.S. Marines motto, short for "Semper Fidelis," which is Latin for "Always Faithful."
Semper I: Pejorative Marine lingo for being overly concerned with one's own personal interests.
Semper Gumby: Another play on Semper Fi. Means "always flexible."
Semper Knife: Yet another twist on Semper Fi. Means "backstabbing."
Turkey peek: To glance around or over an object or surface, such as a corner or wall. ("Now, once you're in there, do a turkey peek around the wall then move to the next building.")
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Old 04-15-2008, 10:03 AM
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lol... all so true... let me know if you have not found the one you were looking for...
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Old 04-15-2008, 10:08 AM
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Good read punky....lol
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Old 04-15-2008, 10:14 AM
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Originally Posted by VTLO910 View Post
lol... all so true... let me know if you have not found the one you were looking for...
Well I was actually looking for something that would tell me, in military lingo, a wiseass way of telling my career military buddy to get his ass in gear and get over here with the Xbox 360 and GRAW 2.....lol.
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Old 04-15-2008, 11:30 AM
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ha! Good read...

I will have to find the "101 ways to prepare for deployment" checklist that was circulating the internet a bit ago...
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Old 04-15-2008, 11:36 AM
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well its only 40 items.. but so true...

Stolen from MCB....

1. Sleep on a cot in the garage.

2. Replace the garage door with a curtain.

3. Six hours after you go to sleep, have your wife or girlfriend whip open the curtain, shine a flashlight in your eyes and mumble, ?Sorry, wrong cot.?

4. Renovate your bathroom. Hang a green plastic sheet down from the middle of your bathtub and move the showerhead down to chest level. Keep four inches of soapy cold water on the floor, stop cleaning the toilet and pee everywhere but in the toilet itself. Leave two to three sheets of toilet paper or for best effect, remove it altogether. For a more realistic deployed bathroom experience, stop using your bathroom and use a neighbor?s. Choose a neighbor who lives at least a quarter mile away.

5. When you take showers, wear flip-flops and keep the lights off.

6. Every time there is a thunderstorm, go sit in a wobbly rocking chair and dump dirt on your head.

7. Put lube oil in your humidifier instead of water and set it on "high? for that tactical generator smell.

8. Don?t watch TV except for movies in the middle of the night. Have your family vote on which movie to watch and then show a different one.

9. Leave a lawnmower running in your living room 24 hours a day for proper noise levels.

10. Have the paperboy give you a haircut.

11. Once a week, blow compressed air up through your chimney making sure the wind carries the soot across and on to your neighbor?s house. Laugh at him when he curses you.

12. Buy a trash compactor and only use it once a week. Store up garbage in the other side of your bathtub.

13. Wake up every night at midnight and have a peanut butter and jelly sandwich on a saltine cracker.

14. Make up your family menu a week ahead of time without looking in your food cabinets or refrigerator. Then serve some kind of meat in an unidentifiable sauce poured over noodles. Do this for every meal.

15. Set your alarm clock to go off at random times during the night. When it goes off, jump out of bed and get to the showers as fast as you can. Simulate there is no hot water by running out into your yard and breaking out the garden hose.

16. Once a month, take every major appliance completely apart and put it back together again.

17. Use 18 scoops of coffee per pot and allow it to sit for five or six hours before drinking.

18. Invite at least 185 people you don?t really like because of their strange hygiene habits to come and visit for a couple of months. Exchange clothes with them.

19. Have a fluorescent lamp installed on the bottom of your coffee table and lie under it to read books.

20. Raise the thresholds and lower the top sills of your front and rear doors so that you either trip over the threshold or hit your head on the sill every time you pass through one of them.

21. Keep a roll of toilet paper on your night stand and bring it to the bathroom with you. Also bring your gun and flashlight.

22. Go to the bathroom when you just have to pass gas ?just in case? every time.

23. Announce to your family that they have mail, have them report to you as you stand outside your open garage door after supper and then say: ?Sorry, it?s for the other Smith.?

24. Wash only 15 items of laundry per week. Roll up the semi-wet clean clothes in a ball. Place them in a sack in the corner of the garage where the cat pees. After a week, unroll them and without ironing or removing the mildew, proudly wear them to professional meetings and family gatherings. Pretend you don?t know what you look or smell like. Enthusiastically repeat the process for another week.

25. Go to the worst crime-infested place you can find, go heavily armed, wearing a flak jacket and a Kevlar helmet. Set up shop in a tent in a vacant lot. Announce to the residents that you are there to help them.

26. Eat a single M & M every Sunday and convince yourself it's for Malaria.

27. Demand each family member be limited to 10 minutes per week for a morale phone call. Enforce this with your teenage daughter.

28. Shoot a few bullet holes in the walls of your home for proper ambience.

29. Sandbag the floor of your car to protect from mine blasts and fragmentation.

30. While traveling down roads in your car, stop at each overpass and culvert and inspect them for remotely detonated explosives before proceeding.

31. Fire off 50 cherry bombs simultaneously in your driveway at 3:00 a.m. When startled neighbors appear, tell them all is well, you are just registering mortars. Tell them plastic will make an acceptable substitute for their shattered windows or just put sand bags over them.

32. Drink your milk and sodas warm.

33. Spread gravel throughout your house and yard.

34. Make your children clear their Super Soakers in a clearing barrel you placed outside the front door before they come in.

35. Make your family dig a survivability position with overhead cover in the backyard. Complain that the 4x4s are not 8 inches on center and make them rebuild it.

36. Continuously ask your wife to allow you to buy an M-Gator.

37. When your 5-year old asks for a stick of gum, have him find the exact stick and flavor he wants on the Internet and print out the web page. Type up a Form 9 and staple the web page to the back. Submit the paperwork to your spouse for processing. After two weeks, give your son the gum.

38. Announce to your family that the dog is a vector for diseases and shoot it. Throw the dog in a burn pit you dug in the neighbor?s back yard.

39. Wait for the coldest /hottest day of the year and announce to your family that there will be no heat/air conditioning that day so you can perform much needed maintenance on the heater/air conditioner. Tell them you are doing this so they won?t get cold/hot.

40. Just when you think you?re ready to resume a normal life, order yourself to repeat this process for another six months to simulate the next deployment you?re been ordered to support.
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Old 04-15-2008, 12:18 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by punkncat View Post
Well I was actually looking for something that would tell me, in military lingo, a wiseass way of telling my career military buddy to get his ass in gear and get over here with the Xbox 360 and GRAW 2.....lol.
Which Branch...?
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Old 04-16-2008, 11:50 AM
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Which Branch...?

He is ex Army paratroops.
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Old 04-16-2008, 12:26 PM
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Don't call him by his name... Just call him "AirBorne"...lol

Let's go AirBorne...!

Pick Up the Pace AirBorne...!

Stop acting like a "Leg" AirBorne...! (Leg = Soldiers who use legs to get to locations rather then drop in like a ParaTrooper)

Lets go, Shuffle to the door...!

lol... all ARMY Airborne Crap... to top it off, buy some army Rank (Gold Metal Type with as many stripes as you can), find a plain black hat, center it on the hat, and put it on and start barking that crap to him when he comes over...lol

The "Trainers" at Airborne school wear "Black Hats" and are known specifically to wear this at jump school...

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Last edited by VTLO910; 04-16-2008 at 12:30 PM..
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